Resilience

The Five Habits You Need To Build Resilience As An Entrepreneur

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My blog's earliest, most loyal follower and advisor gave me feedback on my previous post about Resilience and the Entrepreneurial Hurricane (which makes this post Part 2 of last week's Part 2...mind blowing...)

We discussed how entrepreneurs can create resilience for themselves beyond the reminders of Why they are in business in the first place. We came up with a cool Five Step Process to fortify your beach house:

1. BE OPEN TO FEEDBACK

Exhibit A: This post is being written because I am open to feedback. Without feedback, you do not know how the world is receiving you and what you offer. You might say "I don't care what the world thinks of me", which is noble and impressive and all, but you might want to care about what the world thinks of your business if you are trying to sell a product. 

The best part about feedback is that it comes in so many forms:

  • your mom after reading your blog
  • your dad asking about your financial situation
  • your friends who test your products
  • comments on your social media posts
  • total strangers at a networking event
  • customers after buying your product

You can walk up to a stranger at Starbucks, explain your business, and see what they say.

I have done that a lot, actually. I am so interested in people's responses after I describe what I do because their questions and comments inform how I am describing my service, from which I can adjust my wording. 

I won't go into the nerdy corollaries of how social feedback contributes to species evolution right now, but it suffices to say that you need feedback in order to grow anything, so start practicing openness to it.

 

2. CHOOSE WHO TO LISTEN TO

This one is a big one. If you are open to feedback, you are going to hear it from everyone and everything. The challenge is compartmentalizing what you hear and applying it to your future. As a result, you have to pick and choose what you listen to. 

This happens to me a lot. I mentioned last week that the biggest trap in which I get caught is that of unrealistic comparison to other entrepreneurs and business people. Over time, I have stopped listening to as many interviews by celebrity entrepreneurs and stopped reading as many blog posts about what I "should" be doing right now to succeed. Those people do not know me. Their words are not tailored to my business, so I must determine if I can apply any of their value to my current goals or push it away. 

If you get in the practice of taking some pieces of advice and avoiding others, you will realize who around you gives the most applicable feedback for your business. For me, it is my girlfriend, a handful of advisors, and my clients. I form such a deep connection with my clients and their stories that their feedback on my service is the most golden nugget of input that my business could need. 

For your business, to whose or what voice is most effective for you to listen?

 

3. MEDITATE

Yea, I know I am the billionth thing that has told you to go meditate in the past few years, but this is real. As I discussed in a past post, meditation is a very active practice and it is all about energy.

Meditation helps you slow down and channel energy toward what fuels you. If you can sit still for even five minutes with your eyes closed and watch your thoughts flow around while you are breathing, you will begin to see themes come up in your thoughts. Often times the common thoughts you sense are related to fears or anxieties but, relating to #2, you will also notice voices either from within you or people outside of you. 

Drawing awareness to these voices, even for just five minutes at a time, will help you acknowledge what voices are helpful to hear and which are harmful. 

That way, you can more comfortably deflect negative self-talk while working because you know from where the self-talk might be originating.

 

4. LOGICAL GOAL SETTING

Now that you can discern what to listen to and what not to, you can more clearly see what you want to accomplish today, this week, this month FOR YOURSELF.

I repeat: FOR YOURSELF. Stop thinking about other brands "like" yours, because there are no other brands like yours. No one performs my kind of consulting in the exact way that I do it. Based on the feedback that you have received about YOUR product, what is next on the to do list to keep things going? 

Edit your website?

Change your prices?

Start an email campaign?

This took me a while to understand for myself. I want to write books and create social media campaigns and give lectures and send email newsletters and make TQ coffee mugs and tee shirts and I have wanted to do all of those for years. Even though I am capable of doing all of those things, doing all of those things was not realistic at the time I thought about doing them. 

Similar to the famous line in Jurassic Park, just because I could do something does not mean that I should. 

I got down on myself because I was not accomplishing all of those cool things that a business might have, but then I realized that I was focusing most of my time on customer service and defining my product, which is far and beyond the most important. 

So I wrote all of those cool possible projects down in a list such that, over time, when it feels appropriate, I can look at it and choose one to try out.

It gives me the freedom to focus on what is important right now and still try new things going forward. 

Make the list for yourself of things you either think you "should" be doing or things that you would like to create. Then think about what you have been working on and ask: "what needs to be accomplished right now?"

 

5. PATIENCE, YOUNG GRASSHOPPER

Being a business owner, you can know everything about what going on with your business. This is positive for the sake of productivity, but it is also a challenge because you are the one who thinks most often about the big picture. 

The big picture can be torturous because we business owners want to get to that end goal NOW. We creative, ambitious types are so freaking impatient. It motivates us and tortures us. 

If you have completed Steps 1-4 at this point, then you have a sense of what goals to pursue today. If you actually meditated, you also know how to take a productive deep breath. 

Step #5 is a gentle reminder to be patient. You see the big picture goal. Even though you will not attain it today, the realistic goals you set for yourself today and pursue this week will continue to authentically serve your big picture. 

Take another deep breath. You are doing the work. And you rock.

Now fortify that beach house. You are going to live there for a while.

The 3 Crucial Personality Traits You Need To Start A Business: Part 2 - RESILIENCE

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Okay so you are starting a business. If you read last week's post, you have started to consider the kinds of things to which you must commit beyond the exhilarating fantasy of your product or service idea. It is okay if you do not want to commit to scaling your business and running it from there as an enterprise. There is no shame in that. Just as many entrepreneurs start their business and then decide to change it due to their true interests as those whose ideas do not succeed and the business flops. 

Lesson #1 about starting a business is that it is alllll yourssss. Yes, there is the pressure of succeeding with it on your own, but it simultaneously relieves the pressure of someone above you hounding you about deadlines and "the way it should be done." With that in mind, take a deep breath, look at your list of many many options of places to start, and remember that the choice is yours. 

Now that you have realized there are things called bookkeeping, market research, and email campaigns and you have committed yourself to grinding through them because you care about your mission, you must begin to fortify your defenses when the storms arrive.

Personality trait number two is RESILIENCE

Resilience is defined as "the ability to recover quickly from difficulties" and as "toughness; elasticity". Enough said. 

Entrepreneurship is like building a beach house during hurricane season.

You take care to put every material into its functional spot and build the house such that its strength and efficiency increase its value for years to come. But you build the house in Florida and you can see far into the distance (Are you with me on the metaphor so far?). Then challenges come up:

  1. Early investment of your own money in the house = darkening skies 
  2. Prototyping your product = cloud layers
  3. People demean your idea = rain falls in the distance
  4. Feeling isolated = clouds start to swirl
  5. Self-doubt creeps in = rain clouds move toward you
  6. Vendors terminate a contract = bolt of lightning
  7. No one buys your product = the wind changes
  8. You pick up shifts as a barista to pay rent = the rain wall descends on the beach
  9. Society and the internet tell you a billion different things to do = the storm hits the mainland

Overwhelm ensues. What will you do? How much do you care about your idea? What have you put into the walls of your brand that will help it survive the maelstrom? Even if you have only built the first floor of your beach house, can you sit there amongst the raging winds and pelting rain and still take that next tiny step forward? 

  1. Early investment --> google how to raise money
  2. Prototyping --> who can you test it out on (friends and family are good ones)?
  3. Demeaning people --> that's fine, move on to the people who support you. 
  4. Feeling isolated --> positive self-care and reminders of the courage it takes to face the risk you have.

You see where I am going with this. There is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS a next step, however tiny, to take that still moves you forward but it is up to you to choose to take that step. This is critical to remember. Unless you choose to eliminate the business altogether (which is your choice), you always have another option. No matter how helpless, alone, lost, and foolish you feel. 

I know because I continue to face hurricanes myself. Fun fact about me: my longest standing insecurity is about confidence in competence, or being competent at anything. Even when I achieved great success playing soccer growing up, I felt much self-doubt and perceived incompetence.

You can imagine how a personality complex like that has played into my entrepreneurial life. There are times when my brain goes numb and I cannot recall what I even offer people, what value I bring to them, or why I thought I could be an entrepreneur. I have moved around the country three times in the four years of my business, needing to reconstruct a network and find new clients each time. There have been periods of time when I had 0 clients and 0 leads. There was a time when I did not feel motivated to seek out new leads. 

For me and my life long fragile sense of competence, though, the thing that has kept the hurricane swirling is the expectation that society puts on me as an entrepreneur. I have heard ENDLESS, COUNTLESS, RELENTLESS suggestions on how to run a business, "needing this or that or my business is doomed", from tv, internet, and social media. I have fallen into the trap oh so many times of comparing myself to other business owners and authors of other blogs (who are not in my industry and who may not actually be successful - who knows?). 

I am sensitive to the comparison trap because it feeds my self-doubt. 

Here is the thing, though. I would have never been in the position to compare myself to other entrepreneurs had I never started a business. Furthermore, why do we compare ourselves to others at all?

Because we care about something. 

We start businesses for a reason. There is always a Why that is uniquely yours. I have written a lot about the Why because it is your brand's narrative and conveys your value for the world. In the case of the hurricane, however, your Why is what will get you through. 

Every time I hit a lull or moved or felt overwhelmed or curled up and cried because I was not like X, Y, and Z founders of A, B, and C companies, I can always remember why I love what my business offers and what entrepreneurship offers me.

Do what you have to do to remember!

  • Post-it notes around your apartment
  • Accountability partners
  • Finding that perfect Spotify channel

I am not foolish enough to think that getting my beach house through one hurricane means there will never be another hurricane. In reality, there are rain storms every day that I must face, and the hurricanes will only get bigger as time goes on. 

But when that next storm comes for you, there is no greater brand management tool on the market than a good old fashioned deep breath and remembering your Why.